Author: Isiah McKimmie
Taking care of your relationship can be challenging with little people around, more so with multiples! You’re tired, stressed, touched out, and have so little time for anything else anymore.
So how can you keep your relationship strong and, even, manage to keep a spark alive?
I’m not going to tell you that it’s easy, but here are some tips to help awaken your intimacy after twins, triplets or more.
Remember your relationship is vital to your family
You have so much that you need to take care of but remember that you need to take care of your relationship too. The strength and harmony of your relationship directly impacts your growing family.
Take small moments to help your intimacy after twins, triplets or more
Relationships are made (and broken) in small moments. After having twins or triplets you won’t have the time to spend together that you used to but take little moments where you can connect – to ask each other how you’re doing, share what’s on your mind.
Get creative with date nights
Fun and playfulness are vital to connection and passion. Try to make time each week for a ‘date’, even if that has to happen at home. Do what you can to make it fun and bring some romance back. This will help to awaken the intimacy after twins, triplets or more.
Share appreciation for each other
When you’re busy, communication can become about chores and logistics. We can forget to tell our partner what we love and admire about them. Sharing appreciation regularly builds connection and spark in your relationship. Even if you think your partner already knows – make a point to share one thing you appreciate about them every day.
Learn to manage conflict well
There will be moments of conflict in any relationship, especially when you’re both tired and stressed, which will no doubt happen as you juggle your multiples. Learn to manage this well and repair afterwards when needed. Don’t just let things go because you don’t want to start an argument, as you’ll find that underlying resentments build up over time. Learn ways to effectively share what’s on your mind.
Make intimacy after twins, triplets or more important
Like everything in your life, sex will have changed too. That’s okay. Make a point to make time for it where you can. Setting aside time for ‘Bedroom Dates’ can give you time to prepare and increases the likelihood that you’ll be intimate. Don’t put pressure on yourselves for sex though. Start with what feels good for both of you, even if that’s laying in bed holding hands at the beginning. Just don’t forget this part of your relationship completely.
Isiah McKimmie is a Couples Therapist and Sexologist who has been helping couples have more harmonious, loving relationships for over a decade.
Visit her website for more practical tools and advice or follow her on Instagram.